My best friend and I sat on my couch watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine, aka the best show ever. “If you pull my hair one more time, I’m a kill you, you fat cow,” I say to him in a low voice. The fucker has been annoying me all night. He laughs at me and says, “Sure you will.” I roll my eyes for like the 100th time today.
I was about to get up when I felt him tug my hair again. I was gonna stab this bitch. So I took my knife from my bra and I stabbed him without even looking.
I then heard him cry out in pain. “Oh shit!” I whispered- scream. “Well, I didn’t mean to actually stab you,” I say frantically.
“I’m gonna die!” he shouts. I paused not being able to reply to that. “Uh I might have punctured your heart,” I say to him, blinking rapidly.
He looks at me and I cracked an awkward smile. “At least none of your gene pool will be running around on earth, their gonna be ugly as fuck,” I tell him. I hope that was comforting.
“Why aren’t you doing something,” he says, pain swirling in his eyes. “Um, I don’t know,” I say.
I grab a pillow from the couch and press it against his heart. “Maybe that will do something,” I say. He looks at me with the “Are you serious” look and I shrugged my shoulders.
“Um sorry bestie, your dying today,” I say somewhat sad, I didn’t know I have emotions. “Holy shit, you have emotions,” he says surprised.
He looks at me weirdly, “You’re a crazy bitch, you know that right?” He asks looking at me incredulously. “I know bestie boo,” I say softly.
“I like how you're so chill with me killing you,” I say. “Should’ve done this years ago,” I added joking.
“Sureeeee,” he says. “Well, see you in hell, you psycho,” he says. His eyes then begin to close.
“Wait, how do you know I’m going to hell with you? I ask frantically, wanting to get an answer. Welp looks like he’s dead.
I just sat there looking at his lifeless body for a while. ”I’m gonna miss you, not,” I say.
………………
I do not want to go to jail. I’ll bury him in my garden, a peaceful place. Even though I’m an assassin, I don’t think anyone would suspect me.
꧁༺- // - 𝓔𝓵𝓵𝓮 <3 𝓐𝓱𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓪𝓱 -//-༻꧂
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